"You want MORE logs?!"
"Okay, you really want me to reproduce this AGAIN?!"
"Reopened!? Again!?! No change?! Yikes!"
It all comes down to a collective cry of "Aren't we getting ANYWHERE?!".
Yeah, that point. We've all been there.
Here's the thing. Frustration is just like any escalating behavior. It's perfectly legitimate to be frustrated. Generally, you're not the only one who is feeling that way. And it's inevitable that it will come out. You'll start to see the signs: extremely precise parsing of sentences; the formation of we and they (with "we" being the injured party); intimations that "I'm not going to do anything until someone else does some darn work around here!". None of this is fun, but it's all pretty normal.
The negative of the spiral here is that someone else's frustration will only increase yours, and venting your frustration will only increase theirs. You have to stop the spiral.
So how do we do this?
- Do not let their frustration make yours worse. Take a deep breath before you reply to anything.
- Acknowledge the frustration, out loud and ask for the venting to stop. Note that you're frustrated, too and that you're all working together to try to help. Venting isn't going to help anyone.
- Explain why. If you're asking for work (more logs, a new debug build, reproducing this again), describe what you're hoping to get out of it. It gives the action purpose instead of simply making it look like you don't have a clue.
- Solve it. Ultimately, frustration levels will decrease when the problem goes away.
Frustration is part of daily life. Systems are complex enough and generally finicky enough that there will be hard problems, and problems that take a while to solve, and that's frustrating. How you handle that frustration - yours and someone else's - will help determine how quickly and well you get to a solution.
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